by Mark Willis, Stake Mental / Emotional Support Specialist

Recently I had the opportunity to explain to my kids what the term Y2K stands for. Reflecting back on what was “known” and “unknown” about how the clocks, banking systems, government operations, utilities, computers, etc. would all handle the change from Dec 31, 1999 to Jan 1, 2000 was a source of speculation, planning, preparation, and fear. Shortly after New Year’s day, the unknowns all seemed to be answered, yet the emotions, feelings and concerns before 1/1/2000 were still impactful, emotional and challenging.

While that was 22 years ago, the nuanced challenges, personal trials, and struggles are real and all around. At times that a personal Y2Ks approach, one of the greatest keys to mental health management is Remembering to practice self-care. Just as a medical doctor, lawyer, and therapists all have “practices” we can accept the grace that invites us to try, fail, try, succeed, etc. as we learn more about ourselves and our relationships to self and others as we “practice mortality.” Coming off of stressful days, starting a new career, responding to loss, processing grief, handling loss, are each challenging moments we aren’t meant to bear by “buckling down and ignoring what’s going on inside or thoughts, feeling, and emotions. Instead, they are times for us to lean in, get curious, make connections and see the value of community.

This 3 minute video encompasses that message well for me https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/media/video/2021-10-0030-self-care-made-simple

Michael Gardner, PhD in Family Services shares Stress, depression, and anxiety can creep into our lives at any time. One way to maintain mental health is through proper awareness and recognition of when self-care and self-compassion is needed. {https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2020/09/young-adults/a-3-step-guide-to-maintaining-your-mental-health?lang=eng}

Self-care begins with being conscious of your own needs and how much you can give. Recognizing, understanding, and acknowledging the emotions you feel is important in discovering what your needs are. Here are some self-care practices that can fulfill some of your mental and emotional needs:

• Take care of your body by eating a proper diet, getting enough sleep, and exercising regularly.
• Develop relationships with people you can talk to and share both your concerns and your happiness with.
• Seek good entertainment, hobbies, and activities that bring you joy and a sense of accomplishment.
• Journal to help you express your feelings and organize your thoughts.
• Spend time outdoors.
• Set healthy boundaries and say no when you already have too much going on.
• Practice gratitude. Being grateful helps us avoid feeling sorry for ourselves or blaming others for our unhappiness. Try writing down three things you are grateful for at the end of each day.
• Change negative thoughts and negative self-talk to something positive.
• Remember who you are—a divine child of heavenly parents. You are loved and supported by so many in heaven and on earth.
• Lessen the time you spend on social media (or avoid it altogether).
• Forgive yourself and others. Holding on to grudges or past mistakes adds an unnecessary burden on your shoulders.

I find myself surrendering my peace, progression, and security to other people (or things) when I believe I’ll be taken care of or saved by them alone. The journey of mortality is not a solo trek and we’re invited to help each other as fellow travelers on earth.

Since there is no one who can practice my daily self care for me, I get to do it! Because there’s no one who can know my needs better than me, I get to advocate for myself. Christ showed his example of stepping away, getting his needs met, and saying no with appropriate boundaries as well. I know that He cares for each of his children and that through inviting reflection on changes that can be made, greater peace awaits from giving ourselves better self care.